Category Archives for "Personal Growth"
Personal growth is your life work.
Personal growth is your life work.
What keeps us from doing all that we want? Many say that personal
growth and development and self awareness are our number one
priorities in life, yet most spend very little time and attention
towards this end. Some people do not realize how important it is to
continually grow, in fact they may not even realize they can. Many
people know that they can continue to grow, develop and become more
self aware, but they don’t do much about it.
And then there are those few that seem to be able to actively keep
moving forward on their life path. Why? They allow their thinking
to focus on their enlightenment, on how they think and act on a
regular basis, not just once in a while. They are able to let their
mind calm down and get quiet, allowing the chatter to fade away.
They are willing to allow their fears, doubts and worries to be
present in their thought, knowing that these thoughts can’t
actually harm them – knowing that avoidance just postpones not
There are different reasons why we all don’t actively participate
in our own personal enlightenment, but one of the main reasons is
due to distraction. The human mind can actually do only one thing
at a time, those of you that think otherwise are just good at
rapidly switching from one focus to another. So what we choose to
think about determines much of our life experience. In relation to
distraction, when we think about is something that helps us feel
comfortable or think we should be doing because of our life
responsibilities we are not focusing on growth and self
Now I’m not here to tell you what is and is not important in your
physical life, but I know that you need to apply some of your time
and attention to your inner growth which includes how you think and
act. So what keeps you from doing this you may not even be aware
of. Since it is normal for humans to seek happiness, which we
equate to comfort, we tend to avoid uncomfortable thinking and
feelings. And we do this in many ways, some are our daily
activities. We may not be aware of how our daily activities can be
getting the way of our growth and self-realization
Things you may do to avoid discomfort:
Listening to music
Listening to talk radio
Playing video games
Hold on! You say, “these are normal things.”
Yes they are, but they can all be used as a distraction. And only
you can know what role they play in your life. Like anything,
moderation is usually the best.
There are two situations you may be avoiding.
1)If you tend to go to any activity when you feel
uncomfortable, you are probably escaping. Sure you will feel better
doing something you are familiar with, but this behavior can just
postpone what you are avoiding or even make it worse. What I’m
referring to here relates to more discomfort than simple relaxation
2)One of the biggest things you may be doing without
knowing it is avoiding real thinking. This is when you are
uncomfortable with allowing your mind to run through the incessant
mind chatter, which shakes your worries and doubts in your face, to
the point where your mind is clear.
Life requires balance, and what I have found is that for most, any
self-growth is pushed into a small corner receiving only spare time
attention – sometimes. Are you running in circles doing the same
things each day and not seeing any change? Are you frustrated with
your life? There could be an initial feeling of discomfort when you
choose to allow yourself to think freely and not choose a
distraction, but this will pass. Using methods of relaxation and
meditation will help.
If you want more for yourself take a look at what you do and why
you do it. Take a look at what you do everyday towards your own
personal growth and development, to what you are doing towards
self-realization. Only you can know if you are using activities to
avoid something that is actually more important. Choose to set
aside time to just relax and think – this is how you can get in
touch with your inner self on a more regular basis.
The choice of how you spend your time is yours and the result is
your life experience.
Tips and tools for daily personal growth, increased happiness and
Have you written off your dreams because you think you are too old?
Think about this, more and more Olympic athletes are over 30 and some over 40. The 2008 Summer Olympic Games in Beijing China has more athletes over 30 participating than any time in history. Do you realize how difficult it is to make the Olympic team in a country with a lot of athletes trying to get on the team and where there are many young athletes competing for the positions?
Dara Torres, 41-year-old swimmer for the USA, just got two Silver medals and she out swam her much younger competitor during the last leg of the relay. She has successfully balanced the rigorous training needed with being the mother of a 3-year-old daughter.
Ekaterina Karsten of Belarus, competing in the women’s single skull rowing, brings home a bronze medal and she is 36. This is her 4th Olympics, she has won three gold’s and one silver in this event in those efforts proving she has remained in top shape for many years.
Romania’s Constantina Tomescu is 38 and just won the gold in the women’s marathon. In fact at the halfway point she was in 26th place before she gathered speed to end up finishing almost two and a half minutes ahead of the second place finisher. She finished 20th in the 2004 Olympics but has improved steadily in the last four years as she has gotten older in age.
Oksana Chusovitina the 33 year old German gymnast received a silver medal on the vault. My two daughters were both involved in competitive gymnastics, I know how physicaly brutal this sport is. She has stated that if she is able to qualify for the next Olympics she will, she will be 37. She said, “if I can I’ll do a sixth Olympics.” Is she giving up on what she loves? She says, “I don’t feel 33, I feel 18.” She not only made the German team, she took 3rd place amongst all competitors, most of which are about 16 years old!
Jason Lezek, the US swimmer who helped Michael Phelps win the two team relays, is 32 swimming against athletes 10 to 15 years younger. He has shown that he can still compete in finals in the Olympics as well as other international events.
The ability of athletes continuing to compete at such a high level as they age can be attributed to several factors; more financial support for athletes, better sports medicine, more understanding about diet, but mental perspective and determination is at the foundation of it all. It definitely can become more difficult physically to train as a person gets older and the drive to continue must be strong. But the decisions you make based on your perceptions are the determining factor to what you will motivate yourself to do.
These older athletes are redefining what is possible as we get older. Their success shows what we are capable of when we have the vision, motivation and determination. More importantly is shows that more people are able to see themselves in this role as they continue to get older. When you can see something as possible you are more likely to find the ways to bring it about.
The demise of ones abilities begins with their perception of what is possible and not possible. So often people fall into the mental trap of thinking they are too old for something or that it is not appropriate for an older person. This is just not the case in all instances. Your physical abilities and mental drive is governed by your perceptions of what is possible, what you ‘should’ be doing and many times the influence of others.
This concept does not just apply to sports, any endeavor that you have stopped allowing yourself to see as possible is not necessarily dead, unless you condemn it in your mind. Take time to assess your deep wants and desires and rather than staying with restrictive perceptions, take a fresh look at it. You will discover that many times it is your own mental decisions that have stopped your progress and squelched your dreams, not your actual abilities.
Harland (Colonel) Sanders did not even start franchising his chicken until he was 65 years old, you may have heard of Kentucky Fried Chicken.
What is really possible for you ‘if’ you were to follow your dreams without telling yourself no?
More life changing concepts at Effective Personal Development Blog
Are you actively expressing gratitude every day? You should be. Expressing gratitude is one of the most powerful acts you can do to support your personal growth. There are always even minor things around and in your life that you can start to feel grateful about. The act of focusing on what you are thankful for places those things to a high value in your mind. And what you think about greatly affects your life.
Is your gratitude as potent as it can be? We know that thoughts are powerful, but what is even more powerful? Thought that has emotion added and focused thoughts are far more powerful than plain thought. This is why we tend to see more of what we fervently dislike in our lives, because there are strong emotions attached to the thoughts.
So how do we add emotion and focus to thoughts about gratitude? Write down your thoughts, in a gratitude journal, to engage more of your senses. Your mind is using many more brain cells with the act of writing, thus more of your brain is engaged.
First, Your emotions will greatly increase when there is more brain involvement. And your brain will better be able to link multiple related positive thoughts to your gratitude statements enhancing positive emotional feelings. The number and strength of the neural connections in your brain actually increase with the added activity with writing. The more attention given to anything, the more it will affect your life. The addition of positive emotions will supercharge your gratitude.
Second, your mental focus is enhanced as it takes more of your mind to do the writing. Your mind is pumping out thoughts all the time, how would it know that you want specific thoughts to be more important than all that chatter? You add this importance by giving the thoughts more attention. Writing down what you are grateful for and allowing your related emotions to develop clearly moves other thoughts out of your awareness. You can truly only think one thought at a time. The act of writing helps keep you from bouncing from thought to thought. Gratitude thinking is the kind of thought you want to spend your time with, it is positive and uplifting.
Start a gratitude journal. It can be anything from a fancy hardbound journal to a simple spiral notebook, all you need is blank space to write. With a physical journal it is easier to set up a routine to use it, and it is easy to review when you want a little boost or motivation. You can establish a time of the day to pick up your gratitude journal and express your thoughts and feelings. This helps create a good habit that you will follow over time.
More on Gratitude, Effective Personal development Blog
Are you trying to be successful at something, or with
several areas in your life? This is a characteristic normal
for us human creatures, to feel good about our abilities
and accomplishments. We seem to be continuously striving
for something more to feel good about. We so often think
that we are not doing or being what we want.
When actually, it’s not a matter of finding out ‘how’ to
have success in your life, but rather how and where to
direct your success. The problem is not, not being a
success. The thing is you actually already are very
successful every day, but maybe not at what you would like.
You are successfully living your life, your body is
functioning and you are thinking about something every day,
all day. Now if you weren’t having any thoughts at all, I
would be concerned. And since you are thinking about
something, you are receiving the fulfillment of those
thought requests without fail.
The universe doesn’t fail itself, and since you are a part
of it you will not be failed either. Just as a plant seed
always gets what it requests, so do you. So then why don’t
you get everything you think you want? You want it so you
must be requesting it right.
Well, again you actually are getting everything that you
are requesting. I know it seems like I’m taking you in a
circle here but think about this for a moment, how do you
know what a tulip has requested from the universe? Well,
the tulip would not be a tulip if it had requested
something else. The way to tell what has been requested is
by the evidence that is present.
Then, the other aspect you have is your mental capacity to
reason, think and choose. Sure some other creatures have a
little of this aspect but nothing like we do. A cat can
decide to seek out a warm sunny spot to lay in, but it
can’t learn a new trade or change the way it perceives
things like you can. This second mental ability is one
where you decide what is in the seed – your seed. You have
the ability to design what the seed will request from the
universe, let’s call it your ‘creative seed’.
Now this part is important to understand, just like the
tulip seed and your physical body, your ‘creative seed’ is
always activated with the universe. This means the
universe is constantly reading your request within your
‘creative seed’, thus it is always responding in kind. Here
is the scary part, your thoughts, all of them, are the
‘creative seed’ which is a continuous active request link
to the intelligent universe. So everything you are
thinking is your ‘creative seed’ whether you are or are not
consciously aware of it.
This is why it is so critically important to make it your
main objective all day every day to discover what you are
thinking and adjust it to be congruent with that which best
serves what you want in your life. When you may say that
you want something, but all the while your inner thoughts
are pointed elsewhere and your behavior is reinforcing
something else, your ‘want’ doesn’t hold much weight in the
request seen by the universe. Your predominant thoughts and
actions are so strong; the universe can’t hear what you
You are right now completely successful at what you have
invested your thoughts and energies to, even if you are not
totally aware of them. Your experience in life has a direct
correlation to what you think about and feel strongly about
most of the time. There is an exact relationship to the
percentage of time you allot to any thoughts and your life
So if you want to be successful at something other than
what you are successful at today, you will need to devote a
higher percentage of your thoughts, feelings and energies
in ways that are more in alignment with these desires. Just
occasional lip service will not do.
All of your thoughts combined are what is included inside
of your ‘seed’ that the universe works to fulfil for you.
So ask yourself, “How much of the volume or space in the
seed is taken up with what I deeply want and how much of it
is what I don’t want, don’t like, put up with or just
complain about?” You are constantly creating this seed, and
from this you are completely successful based on what’s in
To change this, you will need to take command of your
everyday thinking, choose to have more of your thoughts,
feelings and actions be congruent with your deep desires.
Using your valuable thought time to complain, ridicule,
doubt, worry, feel angry, resent someone, and many other
negative type thoughts, just steal time you can be filling
your ‘seed’ with what you really want. Plus, you will just
get more in your life to complain, resent, worry about and
all the rest – is that what you really want?
Some people have actually kept track, in time, of their
thoughts all day long in order to discover what percentage
of time they devote to certain ideas. With this you can
discover what undesirable thinking you want to replace with
the aligned thinking you want.
Take command of your thinking now by aligning more of your
thoughts with your deepest desires, you will see your
feelings and actions follow suit, then your life experience
will too. Choose what you are successful at by redirecting
the same tools and power you now use to get what you now
Have you ever allowed yourself to do something that you really should not have?
The human mind is a wonderful thing, however, it can work against you if you allow it to.
Is can be beneficial to understand how this can happen so you can prevent it, keeping yourself out of undesirable situations.
Last week, in my family we experienced a situation that is a good example of how the mind can lead us astray – if we let it.
My youngest daughter came to a point of thinking something was OK to do, when it was not.
It appears that her path of thought was supported more by her desire to do something rather than all the facts.
She justified, in her mind, that certain things occurred in ways that supported her desire.
The mind can do this easily.
This allowed her to make decisions that further supported what she wanted.
It’s a normal function of the mind that it tries to find solutions that support our desires – this is how we grow, develop and fully experience our life.
You may have noticed how your mind may attempt to circumvent your values in an attempt to take the shortest route to producing your desire.
You support this line of thinking when you take a small step allowing your mind to guide you to think something is acceptable now when previously it was not.
It’s usually a small step, but then another small step, and another and so on.
And you will find yourself doing something you shouldn’t.
This is where you may say something to yourself like;
“It will be OK this time”, or
“They didn’t tell me not to”, or
“But I really want this”, or
“Who will know”, or
“Just this once”, or
You may recall some of your own.
Here is where you need to be in command, to temper the minds tendency to give you what you want- no matter what.
This is an opportunity for you to solidify your standards and principles.
Every time you stop your mind from taking the shortest route to give you what you want, you strengthen the position of your values.
Even when you think you have developed habits that are based on your principles, still be on the watch for what you are doing.
Keep monitoring your thoughts and actions, your unconscious mind can slip into finding the easiest way to accomplish your desires without telling you – that’s how it’s built.
Don’t take for granted that you are all set with your thinking.
Change is constant with new and different circumstances coming before you that need your interpretation.
Continue to filter everything through your principles.
Justification is just a convenient way to circumvent your principles in order to get what you want.
Justification turns off the filtering mechanism you use to interpret what you do.
Vigilant thought management is the key.
“Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Choose your
words, for they become actions. Understand your actions, for they become habits. Study your habits, for they will become your character. Develop your character, for it becomes your destiny.” — Anonymous
“The soul is dyed the color of its thoughts. Think only on those things that are in line with your principles and can bear the light of day. The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you do is who you become. Your integrity is your destiny – it is the light that guides your way.” — Heraculitus
“The character ethic, which I believe to be the foundation of success, teaches that there are basic principles of effective living, and that people can only experience true success and enduring happiness as they learn and integrate these principles into their basic character.” — Stephen Covey
“Character and personal force are the only investments that are worth anything.” — Walt Whitman
Asking yourself questions is one of the best ways to get an answer.
Well, yes – that statement is obvious – but do you really get it?
Follow me here a minute – –
How many times do you let something undesirable continue to go on and on?
Why is this?
Part of the reason is that you may allow yourself to stew over something and replay the distasteful aspects over and over.
This mental activity does not support doing anything productive to find a solution or termination of the situation.
It actually just perpetuates or even enhances it.
I’ll bet you can easily think about some situations where you.
So, think again about situations where you have moved through into a solution or beneficial outcome.
What did you do to get to this point?
You asked yourself questions – didn’t you.
This may still seem too basic to you – what is he getting at?
OK, you move on with some change by asking yourself a question.
Why did this happen?
Who did this?
What do I do now?
How can I fix this?
You get the idea.
Aren’t movement, understanding and change always based on a question?
The point I am making here is that you will stay repeating the same thoughts and actions until you ask a question.
So then this leads to the fact that the beneficial outcome is based on the kind of questions you ask yourself.
Questions that probe deeper and deeper are the ones that are most valuable.
Questions that are bases on continually asking a question and being aware of the various answers you receive.
Questions that carry on from an answer you get.
Questions that continue to ask why – again and again – not just stopping at the first answer.
The quality of the outcome is directly related to the quality of the questions you ask.
This is related to a very basic concept – that there is always a new idea coming out of an existing one.
One idea leads to another.
Think about it – when you get an understanding about something, there are now new possibilities available that weren’t before.
The key here is that asking a question is the way that you seek that next understanding that builds upon the previous idea.
If you don’t ask – you remain with what you have.
Your unconscious mind may tend to resist this kind of probing questions if you are not accustomed to doing this.
Your mind will tend to just want to repeat what it has been doing.
This is where you will need to exercise your command over your thinking ability.
Learning to step aside from a situation to purposefully ask yourself questions with the purpose of developing new perspectives and understandings is a very valuable skill.
This stepping aside, quieting your chattering mind and asking questions is a skill that must be practiced frequently if you are to get it to be a normal part of your behavior.
You can only override your existing habitual ways of thinking by developing a new pattern.
One idea leads to another – and another, and so on.
Keep asking questions and you will find that you will get more and more appropriate and useful answers revealed to you.
You will learn to be receptive to more answers that come from your inner self and universal intelligence.
Be open to the feelings and varying ways answers are conveyed to you.
This is growth in action.
. . . On purpose.
“Every clarification breeds new questions.” — Arthur Bloch
“Asking the proper question is the central action of
transformation… Questions are the key that cause the secret
doors of the psyche to swing open.” — Clarissa Pinkola Estes
“The answers you receive depend upon the questions you ask.” — Thomas Kuhn
“Problems cannot be solved at the same level of awareness that created them.” — Albert Einstein
“The word question is derived from the Latin quarrier (to seek) which is the same root as the word for quest. A creative life is a continued quest, and good questions can be very useful guides.
Most useful are open-ended questions; they allow for fresh
unanticipated answers to reveal themselves.” — Source Unknown
“It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.” — Decouvertes