April 7, 2006

We All Need Time And Space To Be

Are you always ‘on’ or distracted or interacting with others?

This can lead to a low level stress if you are not allowing yourself ‘alone’ time.

An important aspect of life that is often overlooked is the quiet and ‘alone’ time that we all need to get in touch with ourselves.

All of the different categories of activities we are involved with in life are necessary. I am talking about our social interaction, workgroup relations, individual relationships, family relationships, intimate relationships and our relationship with self. Each of these is a vehicle for our growth and development, as we learn and experience differently from each one.

Many people don’t give a lot of thought as to what kind of a balance we have in our life with these activities. The most commonly someone will notice that they are alone much of the time and they yearn for more human interaction. If you are in this situation it would be worth your while to make the effort to get around more people, interacting in some way that you find enjoyable.

One of the things that can happen is that we can find ourselves ‘on’ too much and not having any time for ourselves without outer interactive stimulus. Being ‘on’ is when you are actively involved with outside stimuli, thinking and acting in conjunction with them, almost feeling that it you are on automatic. This is a part of the necessary human experience; we are designed to inter-relate with one another. We learn about others as well as about ourselves from others, as well as develop our interaction skills.

But, in this state we are not usually with ourselves, we are distracted from outside rather than in tune with ourselves. Not that we should be looking to be selfish with our self, but we do need time to ourselves. We each need our own time to be just with ourselves and many times this is overlooked in life.

Particularly when there are people in our life that are demanding our attention for various reasons. We just see this as our life and not think much about it, but we a neglecting a very necessary need we all have, to be alone. We need to just ‘be’ with our thoughts, to be able to calm down our thoughts and this can’t be done with the constant input of stimulus from outside of us.

One common activity where people need to be alone is meditation, even if you practice this in a group, you become alone. Others around you are not attempting to interact with you, they are being with themselves as well. With meditation you learn to calm your thinking and let go, allowing yourself to be aware at a much deeper level.

Another necessary individual activity is introspection. Just being able to allow your thoughts to delve into something you want to ponder or understand.

For most people, being alone in thought is how they connect with our creativity as well as our intuition. These are necessary connections we must be able to cultivate in order to expand our life experience.

We also need our ‘alone’ time to relax in a way that does not even occur when in the company of a loved one. Many people get much relaxation feel rejuvenation from activities they do alone with no outside stimuli. This allows one to do just as they wish without the need to consider how it affects others.

Some people are not able to get their thoughts into a ‘flow’ unless they are alone. Look to people in history, scientist, writers, painters, philosophers and inventors all had much ‘alone’ time, where their ideas ‘flow’.

Many people are by nature very concerned about the people in their life, that they are continuously considering how everything they do could affect the other. They can’t seem to get out of this mode of thought as long as they are around other people.

So, to be able to allow their mind to relax, get calm, to allow intuition and creativity to surface, they must be along on a regular basis.

This can be something you have not even thought about, as you may be doing just fine with the amount of ‘alone’ time you are getting. But someone you interact with may not be getting the ‘alone’ time they need.

We all need ‘alone’ time to truly come to understand ourselves. One of the most powerful thought activities you can do is to ask yourself and spirit questions about yourself and life to gain a deeper understanding of yourself.

It is absolutely necessary, if you want to grow and develop in life, to continually seek to understand more about yourself and you must calm your thinking in order to do this.

One of the things we all can do in our various relationships is to keep this basic human need in mind. Make it a point to allow those who want this ‘alone’ time to have it. Provide them the space they need.

When we are able to do these alone activities we are actually better for the people we relate with. We are more understanding, calmer throughout the day, less susceptible to stress, just have a better attitude overall.

Make it a point to notice the different ways we each seem to have different needs in terms of being alone. Learn to respect the ‘alone’ time needs of others. Some need to be alone when they are upset before they want to talk about it, some need to be alone to be creative,

Notice what others need and allow them to be themselves, everyone has a different mix of activities that works best for them. There is always a way to compromise with the needs of all, if you make it your intent.

There are good days available, get yours now!

John

John

I have studied many aspects of personal growth, spirituality, religion, psychology, and philosophy for over 40 years. My writing and training reveals ideas and methods which assist with affecting the desired change and growth people want to live more happy and fulfilling lives. Much focus is on what can be done daily and the how it can be implemented for actual results as opposed to just collecting information.

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